My thoughts...

I was reading treksi's blog a while ago and read her entry...

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

I WISH I KNEW HOW TO QUIT YOU

I was telling Van and Jay the other day, what’s worse than being single during this curse of coupledom called Valentines, is not even being able to relate to the whole warm and fuzzy feeling of love. Or being in love. Sometimes I wish I was telling someone this very moving line from Brokeback Mountain “I wish I knew how to quit you..” Because it doesn’t really mean he wants to quit, but he is so overwhelmed with love, he doesn’t know how to handle it anymore. And I used to want that. No. I still want that. I want to want that. But after several heartaches, it seems my heart just stopped.

Just barely a month ago, I was wondering how I can ever un-love bestie. No matter what I tried to do then, he was always in my heart. I loved him so much I went into the I’ll-take-whatever-I-can-get mode L But one day I woke up and realized I was so tired. Of crying and longing for things that I can never have with him. Of wishing he was mine to love and to hold and to hug. It was one of the saddest days in my life.

And just like that, I was able to quit him. My heart quit on him.

Sometimes it scares me because it’s as if my heart has quit on love, too.

...after reading this...i remember how it went with Brian...it is true what other people say..."Gigising ka isang araw tapos parang...wala na...ayaw mo na..."...yun ang kinatapusan ko sa feelings ko for brian...nagsawa na rin...manhind na manhid sa mga nangyari...i think ito rin yung sinsabi nila na..."time heals all wounds"...

alam ko ngayon...m hurting...sobra...(marekoy...hug nga jan!!!)...pero...alam ko malalagpasan ko nalang din ito...kinaya ko non..kakayanin ko rin ngayon...Ü...kaya para sa mga kakilala ko na chaket chaket din ang puso...we'll get thru this...Ü...hmmm...meantime guys...?!?!?!ÜÜÜ

...pachal pachal nalang!Ü!