On what might have been and what has been

Ali popped the million dollar question last night..."Mahal ka pa kaya ni McDeary"...namannnnnnn....tama ba yun..patulog na e...susmaryosep. hahaha...ayan tuloy...late na ako nagising...sleeping with a heavy heart causes oversleeping...hahaha

McDeary,

i dont know why im evern writting this one...
Jcboy and dencio, you very well know we are close...Jcboy and i has lot of common friends...its not hard to be friends with Jcboy...good converstaionalist and listens to your stories, and gives you that comforting hug when you needed the most. Dencio, one of your housemates that surprised me, he is my insider you know...tells me the latest about you...talks with sense...a very good conversationalist...
When i heard that you were going out with BnP, i was stunned...i tried to get every details about whats happening between you two...dencio, trix, karen, lahat na...every possible resource...pagagalawin ko just to get some details...basta as soon as i heard...nag back off na ako...parang i did not see the point na parang..."raise bet"...(masyadong poker na pati mga terms ko...shet)...then i got tip...friends lang daw kayo...to me...parang....really...but too early to say...there is Ariel...so wala na talga..."FOLD"
...for all the times that you called, texted(wee hours in the morning), passed by our house that i did not seem to appreciate your effort...call it whatever...siguro..hindi pa kasi ako sugarol nun...hindi ako sumugal...i saw myself as one of your girls...and i know i am...pero if ever i did played the game...ano nga kaya...
now...i can feel iba na...as some would say...they have their happy pill..their sources of endorphins...with you..i think ...my prescription is already expired...
Its too hard to limit it to this blog...all the thoughts...explanations...questions..."why we never met at the right time..."...huwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...stop it na!!!!
...all i feel is the ice...
:(

missing mcdeary,
van